Imposter Syndrome… better known as the voice inside your head that can shout the loudest.
There hasn’t been one step of my personal, professional or academic career where I haven’t suffered with Imposter Syndrome and it’s caused me, at times, to completely shut off from everything I know and love. I announced in a previous blog post that I had secured a PhD position (I’m sorry, I can’t even pretend that’ll be the last time you hear about it) but even now, when I have a firm offer with MY NAME written on it my Imposter brain is telling me that they’ve got it wrong or that I only got it because I was the best out of a bad set of candidates.
As you can see, I still suffer with Imposter Syndrome, so this blog post is going to be a combination of ways I’ve learnt to deal with it as well as idealistic processes to beat those negative thoughts for good – way easier said than done!!
Differentiate Feelings from Fact
Negative and anxious thoughts often stem from a lack of control of a situation. Imposter Syndrome inherently stems from feeling inferior to your current surroundings. One thing that has really helped put things into perspective for me has been differentiating between something that I can’t control (a fact) and something I can control (a feeling).
Accepting that you can’t change a fact but can change the way it makes you feel is a really brilliant way of controlling the spiralling thoughts that can come with having Imposter Syndrome. It becomes a moment rather than a life defining thought process.
Acknowledging Feelings of Doubt
Acknowledging negative thoughts and feelings can be a really effective way of accepting them and moving past them.
For example, on a regular basis I think to myself “you are out of your depth here, you’re going to look stupid”. Instead of letting that thought sit inside my head and get bigger, actively accepting the thought and quite literally popping it like a bubble can sometimes mean the difference between a really bad imposter attack and just getting through the situation.
I learnt this technique through meditation (if you haven’t tried meditation yet, you need to). And it’s a really effective way of dealing with those overwhelming thought bubbles that pop into your head and over take every thought.
Making Mistakes = Growth
All too often we miss opportunities for fear of making a mistake. But how do we learn if we don’t make mistakes? You weren’t born with the knowledge of, say 2+2 – how many times do you think you answered 1, 2, 3, 5, 6 or literally any other number except 4 before you finally learnt that 2+2=4. That’s a very crude example but it identifies the point perfectly that everything you currently know about anything has been LEARNT. Reflect on what you knew about a subject 1 year ago compared to now? Life would be boring if we spent our whole life with the exact same knowledge. Believe it or not even the most successful people once answered 5 to the question “what’s 2+2?”.
When we start looking at making mistakes as growth potential, they become constructive instead of ways to bring us down. Growth is a brilliant part of our development and it’s how we progress in anything we enjoy. Instead of being afraid of failing, why wouldn’t we instead be afraid of failing to meet our goals?
Own your Successes
All too often we obsess over what other people have achieved compared to us. And in the age of social media these obsessions become even more frequent. But if we spent as much time focussing on our own achievements as we do on others’ we’d have a very different perception of ourselves.
Also, reality check: that feeling of envy you have over someone else’s life, is the exact feeling of envy someone has over your life.
A really great tip I’ve seen is to start making a note of all the successful things you accomplish to refer to when you’re feeling particularly out of your depth. Similar to positive affirmations, these gentle reminders are an easy way to tell ourselves “you’re doing ok”. Reaffirm these successes, remind yourself often how incredible you are!
Know your triggers
For some people certain situations and scenarios are triggers for their Imposter Syndrome. Now, it goes without saying that if you can, avoid those known triggers. But of course, that’s not always possible and I don’t believe in living your life avoiding things because you know it triggers your imposter brain.
Journalling is a great way of visualising your true thoughts on paper. It provides a space where you can analyse your positive and negative feelings. Tracking back these thoughts and feelings allows you to ultimately begin recognising your triggers and how you deal with them best – your coping mechanisms. Identifying these coping mechanisms are really great to help stop Imposter Syndrome ruling your life.
Give yourself the advice you’d give your best friend and FAKE IT ‘TIL YOU MAKE IT
Okay, I cannot stress this ENOUGH. If you’re struggling with the other principles then this one is fool proof.
If your best friend came to you with feelings of doubt what would you say to them? Say those reassuring words to yourself !! Treat yourself the way you’d treat your best friends. We have come to look at self care as face masks and long walks and of course things like that do make us feel better – I love nothing more than a face mask to pretend like I have my life together. But do these processes reach our true self care deep down? They are a temporary fix. A plaster if you will.
And if in doubt and things get really tough, slap on a smile and pretend you belong there. The only person in that situation who thinks you don’t belong there is you. Fake it until you make it. Life would not have put you in this position if you weren’t capable of achieving it.
One thing I wanted to add is the staggering amount of women in STEM who suffer with Imposter Syndrome !!! I’ve spoken to so many girls about how they feel being part of a minority industry and the majority have said they find it quite empowering being one of the only females in their office/on their course. However that can inherently lead to Imposter Syndrome without even realising it until you’re in too deep. I remember not even answering questions in classes I KNEW THE ANSWER to for fear of embarrassing myself in front of the boys. This is something I really want to address and change.
I was lucky enough to be part of the first ever all girls physics A Level group in my high school and I think it was a blessing in disguise – It was only recently that I understood the true value and privilege involved with this class. But I can’t even pretend how daunting it was when I started my degree, sitting in a lecture theatre with 150+ other people – 95% boys – and being asked a technical question. In fact, once I laughed too loud (you know, those ugly loud laughs you do by accident) in a lecture and didn’t go back for a few weeks because I was so embarrassed. I’m not sure if this is Imposter Syndrome or shear giving myself the ‘ick’ but either way I would have felt a lot more at ease in a room with a few more girls.
If you take anything away from this post… Imposter Syndrome does not define you! I’m going to be adding a quick reference guide to my Instagram @girlswhostem_ and Facebook Girls Who… STEM for those moments in need but feel free to bookmark this post to refer to when you need to.
You’ve got this. You deserve to be where you are. And life would not present you with challenges you are not ready for!
All my love, Meg x
Girls Who STEM 
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